Keep the Focus

Right now I have several distractions in my life at home and at school.  They are the things that keep calling out to me…”Pay attention to me.”  “Give me your energy and time.”  “I am what is important.”  But they are distractors.  They are pointing me in the wrong direction.  They are the things that cause me to go to places of self-doubt, resentment, gossip, and even a bit of hopelessness.

But those things that keep my eye on what is important give me energy and a sense of purpose and belonging.  Today I choose to keep my eye on those things.  One tool I use to keep balance and look at the important is examining my four natures.

Physical

Today I will focus on my health and loving my physical body.  In recent months I have had a growing acceptance of my body.  Recently I went to visit my mom.  Out of the blue Mom said to me, “I hate my stomach.  I know you do too.”  And my response was, “No, mom, lately I have been loving my stomach.”  Her response, “No you don’t.  Don’t lie to me.”  Mine to her…”Really, mom, I have been loving my body. I love my stomach”  I find that that compassionate stance with a vessel that has taken me through thick and thin has allowed me to take care of myself in a loving way.  To eat right.  To exercise.  To live in what I have been given.  And to accept myself where I am. 

Emotional

Today I will focus on the relationships in front of me and build capacity in my life to love deeply.  I have two adult children who I dearly love.  I have friends who adore me and who I adore.   Today, as I get caught up in things that don’t go the way I might want, or get hurt because of something said not quite right, or wish for love not being offered, I will take a breath and ask myself how can I best build love.  That will take me where I want to go.

Mental

My mental domain has been square in the middle of school.  School started two weeks ago (in upstate NY that is so rare as school typically begins after Labor Day).  But at school I am and there are hundreds of details and some big pieces that are unknown and scary for some.  So…today I am keeping my focus on the students in my school.  We have over 400 of them--all coming to learn and to develop skills that will help them at school and in life.  I will keep my focus on them when other distractors come along.  When I find my time eaten up or my focus on the minutia, I will remind myself of the students and ask myself if what I am doing that contributes to my desire to give the best school experience possible for these young people.

Spiritual

Today I will give myself time for quiet and reflection.  Time to write to hear my voice and to write to give myself the possibility to touch on inner wisdom that is bigger than who I am.  It is in that space, I know my best self and understand my life purpose.  It is in that space that I can know self-acceptance and self-love.  It is in that space that I see who I am and see me as God sees me.  When I center, when I pray, when I reflect--to me they are all the same, I find peace.  Here is the place I really keep the focus.  And with that focus, giving back is natural and balance is inevitable. 

Join the Spiritual Round-Up at Reading Teaching and Learning.  http://hollymueller.blogspot.com

Feed the Right Voice

Choice has been a big word for me this year.   I have written previously about how we cannot always choose our circumstances, but we can ALWAYS choose how to respond to our circumstances.  Last week, in a beginning staff meeting, we discussed ways that we can choose our inner dialogue as a way to create satisfaction and a sense of purpose.    Consider this Fable:

ONE EVENING, AN ELDERLY

CHEROKEE BRAVE TOLD HIS

GRANDSON ABOUT A BATTLE THAT

GOES ON INSIDE PEOPLE.

HE SAID "MY SON, THE BATTLE IS

BETWEEN TWO 'WOLVES' INSIDE US ALL.

ONE IS EVIL. IT IS ANGER,

ENVY, JEALOUSY, SORROW,

REGRET, GREED, ARROGANCE,

SELF-PITY, GUILT, RESENTMENT,

INFERIORITY, LIES, FALSE PRIDE,

SUPERIORITY, AND EGO.

THE OTHER IS GOOD.

IT IS JOY, PEACE, LOVE, HOPE, SERENITY,

HUMILITY, KINDNESS, BENEVOLENCE,

EMPATHY, GENEROSITY,

TRUTH, COMPASSION AND FAITH."

THE GRANDSON THOUGH ABOUT

IT FOR A MINUTE AND THEN ASKED

HIS GRANDFATHER:  "WHICH WOLF WINS?..."

THE OLD CHEROKEE SIMPLY REPLIED,

"THE ONE THAT YOU FEED"

We each have both voices inside of us.  Sometimes one is louder than the other.  How can we feed the good wolf that produces joy, peace love and all of those other attributes that bring a sense of fulfillment and positivity?   Here are a couple of practices that I do to bring out that voice I want to feed.

• I make a list of my blessings at the end of every day a practice.  It is how I journal in the evening and how I end my day.   If in the middle of the day, the wolf I don’t choose to feed is breaking into my thoughts, listing five blessings right then and there is a good way to break the negativity.   This year our school is noting those things we want to feed in our school.  Every day each of us is listing something positive that occurs every day during the school year.  I know for me, this list will be a well of support when I have a dark day and nothing seems to be positive.
• As I do my evening journal, I set an intention for the next day, based on what I think I might need to help me maintain that centered place.  Today my intention is to have relaxed productivity.  I knew that today would be non-stop and, when setting my intention, I knew that I would need to be relaxed within the productivity to keep feeding the wolf I want to nourish.  Having this intention allows me to hold that space through the day.

There are days that the wolf that brings us down grabs a hold of us.  On those days, negative feelings and thoughts naturally creep in.  When I was a principal in a primary school, there were those days when I thought I could do nothing correctly and my negative thoughts were bigger than life.  In those instances I would often reflect on what I was feeling and the whys of that feeling.  If the feeling was based on something I could control, I might make an action.  Sometimes I realized that I was overly tired.  In cases like that, I might choose to not make any big decisions and to get a good night’s sleep the next night.  I am always amazed at how a good night’s sleep changes perspective.  Those days came less and less as I quietly and gently looked at what was happening inside and acknowledged and supported the voice that gives me power.

What are ways that you feed the positive wolf?  How do you teach your students to do the same?

Thank you to Two Writing Teachers for dedicating space and time for teachers and teachers of literacy to come together to share ideas, practice and life experience.

Reframing the Story--A Reminder as I Start Another School Year

I am learning about the importance of framing a stories to the point of view that I find important--to the point of view that I want to represent me.  Too often I tell the story in a victim way rather than a visionary way.  I can look at the exact same story in a variety of ways and the way I choose to look at it makes all of the difference.

For example, below is the same story played out in two different ways:

Take 1:  This summer I have been swimming laps and taking water movement classes in my local pool.  Last Thursday I was anticipating doing water intervals, as I had been away from the water for several days.  I was in the pool, dancing to the music with several other women and men.  My heart was starting to pump and I felt energy arising within myself and with the group as our movement reached a crescendo.  Suddenly, the lifeguard blew her whistle.  This sound is rare at our pool and everyone looked in surprise.  “Clear the pool,” shouted the guards and we all exited as quickly as we could.

"Why?" we wondered as we stood by the pool sidelines.  Soon we found out.  A baby pooped in the pool.  Frustrated I sat in a pool chair and moped.  It had been four full days since I was in the water.  I so wanted to exercise and now I couldn’t.  And who are the parents who let their child poop in the pool.  My world got darker and darker with my ugly thoughts.  A grey cloud covered my head and went with me as I continued what turned out to be a bleak day…

Take 2:  This summer I have been swimming laps and doing water intervals in my local pool.  Last Thursday I was anticipating doing water intervals, as I had been away from the water for several days.  I was in the pool, dancing to the music with several other women and men.  My heart was starting to pump and I felt energy arising within myself and with the group as our movement reached a crescendo.  Suddenly, the lifeguard blew her whistle.  This sound is rare at our pool and everyone looked in surprise.  “Clear the pool,” shouted the guards and we all exited as quickly as we could.

"Why?" we wondered as we stood by the pool sidelines.  Soon we found out.  A baby pooped in the pool.   Wow.  I really wanted to swim today because I miss the water but thank goodness the staff takes this so seriously.  Look at them clearing the pool and doing the things needed to make the water safe for us to swim.  They even took the equipment we were wearing to sanitize it.  I think I will relax in the sun instead--and count it as a day of exercise.  Tomorrow is a new pool day.  And today, well, today I am going to enjoy a bit of sun...

                                    *                                  *                                  *

In life we get choice as to how to frame our story.  Both scenarios were exactly the same.  The frame was different.  And it makes all of the difference.

Today is the first day of a new school year for me.  As I start a new year with staff and with students, I choose to frame the stories that are given to us as we make our way through the year in a positive and inspiring way.  If we each did this, what a wonderful year we would have.  Despite the circumstance, in both good and bad, positive and negative, we choose positivity.  We choose inspiration.  What could be better than that?!  

Thank you to Two Writing Teachers for dedicating space and time for teachers and teachers of literacy to come together to share ideas, practice and life experience.